Soyuzmultfilm Moscow 1957
Once Upon a Time, In a Far Away Tsardom...
This is an old tale about Tsar Goroh* *(Pea)
Princess Maria, a foreign prince, Emelian and a magic pike.
screenplay by Nikolay Erdman director-producer Ivan Ivanov-Vano
director Mihail Botov art director Perch Sarkisyan Ass. G. Arkadyev, S. Rusakov, L. Model
camera Mihail Druyan music Yu. Nikolskiy sound Georgiy Martynyuk
animators V. Krumin, B. Dyozhkin, K. Chikin, V. Pekar G. Novozhilov, R. Kachanov, Ye. Khludova, B. Butakov V. Kotyonochkin, V. Likhachyov, F. Hitruk, L. Reztsova, V. Dolgikh
background artists I. Kuskova, O. Gemerling, D. Anpilov, Pyotr Korobayev, K. Malyshev montage A. Firsova, ass. dir. Ye. Turanova, G. Lyubarskaya
voice artists S. Anikeyev, Grigoriy Shpigel, Lev Potyomkin, Mariya Babanova, Georgiy Vitsin, Vera Orlova, Georgiy Millyar, Vladimir Gulyayev
Brr! We're here.
What are you going to do with me now, Emelian?
- I'll give you to my granny! She will cook a fat fish-soup of you.
Emelian, don't give me to your granny!
Don't make soup of me!
Release me, so I can return to my little kids,
my little pikes!
Do you have a lot of them?
Forty-four!
Just of think of how those little orphans will live without a mother.
Have mercy on poor me!
- All right, but be careful next time!
Don't get caught again!
There's nothing for it.
We'll have meatless soup instead of fat fish soup.
Ekh, Emelian. Not in soup does happiness lie.
For letting me go, I'll grant you everything you wish.
You are kidding me!
Trust my words, Emelian,
whenever you want something, you just need to say:
"At the pike's behest and at my request..."
and it will come true.
Well. At the pike's behest and at my request...
Buckets, walk yourselves home!
At the pike's behest and at my request...
The Tsar-Emperor comes!
Look Maria, what the foreign prince has sent you!
Oh, how fine he is!
Oh, how handsome he is! But he's too skinny.
He will put on weight enough once he eats our food.
So when will he arrive, Tsar-Emperor?
Any hour now.
Oh, I need to do my hair!
So do it right away!
You should drive into the forest, Emelian,
we have no more firewood in the yard.
All right, maybe I will.
At the pike's behest and at my request...
Sledge, ride to the forest!
Hey-hey, look out!
Look out!
Oh, charmant, charmant! Magnifique!
Charmant! Magnifique!
Hey! Look out! Look out!
How awful, how awful! Hold him! Seize him! Help! Help!
At the pike's behest and at my request...
Axe, chop off some branches!
And now, my saw, it's your turn!
- Bonjour. - Uh, "Hello, there".
- Good day. - Bonjour.
- Sh-hello!
At the pike's behest and at my request...
Let this young lady fall in love with me!
what happened to you?
I'm in love.
J'aime!
Moi aussi* *(Me too)
He loves you too.
But it is not you whom I love.
Have you gone mad, girl?
What do you mean, it's not him?!
Who is it, then?!
Ah! I don't know.
At the pike's behest and at my request...
Logs, pile yourselves on the sledge
And tie yourselves with the rope.
Dry your eyes at once and get married!
- I'll dry my eyes...
but I won't get married!
How dare you refuse me, insolent girl!
My foreign policy requires that you marry this prince.
Love cannot be forced daddy. I love someone else.
Who is this "someone else"?
Confess immediately!
- But I don't know it myself!
Mashka, don't lie!
- I swear, I don't know.
Hey! Guards! Lock her in the tower until she confesses!
- And what do you bring here? - A letter!
- From whom? - From the foreign prince.
Open it! Read it!
"Today, on the territory of your tsardom,
a subject of your majesty...
assaulted me and gave me a large lump and a bruise!"
So, so, so!
"Because of that,
I lost half my attractiveness
and received from the princess a total rejection!"
"...total rejection!"... Uh...
"I request punishment of the assailant
and please send me some new face-powder as I have none left.
The Foreign Prince."
Call my chief general!
Let the chief general come to the Tsar!
...chief general... to the Tsar....
Tell me immediately,
who assaulted the foreign prince and left him with a big bruise?!
- Emelian!
And who is he?
A local fool.
Here is my royal order:
If you do not bring him to my palace within the hour,
I will relieve you of all your medals, as well as your head!
Hup-two!
Hup-two! Hup-two! March! March!
Is this where Emelian the fool lives?
Yes. What can I do for you?
Put your clothes on, fool,
Put your shoes on, fool,
- You'll ride to see the Tsar, fool! Hup! Two!
- Nah, I won't.
- What?! - I'm feeling too lazy!
It's freezing outside, while here I'm cosy warm.
I'll make you go, you scoundrel! Hup-two!
At the pike's behest and at my request...
Drumsticks, hit the general for a good couple of rounds.
Alarm! Alarm! Alarm!
Well, that's enough for him!
Ach, Ach, here is my order for you!
Either you bring Emelian the fool to the palace,
or I will relieve you of your drum,
and your head, too!!
Hup-two! Hup-two! Oi, Oi!
I humbly beg you, Emelian Ivanovich, let's ride to the Tsar together.
Nah, I won't go! I'm feeling too lazy!
It's chilly outside, and really cosy warm on the stove.
But Emelian Ivanovich, have mercy on me!
If you will not go, the general will take my drum...
and cut my head off.
- I feel sorry for you, drummer,
but I'm not willing to leave my stove in such cold weather.
Well, so be it...
At the pike's behest and at my request...
Stove, you take me to the Tsar!
Hey! Look out!
- It's her! - It's him!
Is it him?
- C'est lui? - C'est lui.
It's him!
Well just you wait, villain!
Who gave you the right...
to assault the foreign prince
and leave him with a bruise, and a big lump on his head?!
Well, why didn't he pull over when I shouted "look out"?
Ach, you rube!
Put him in the tower for his insolence!
But, my Tsar, Princess Maria is being held there!
Mmmm, yes...
Well, how are you holding out there?
Have you changed your mind yet?
I have!
So you will not resist any more?
- I will not.
And you will get married?
I will!
Then here is my command!
Come down and kiss.
Kiss whom, daddy?
The one whom you love!
Translate for the Foreign Prince.
Princess Maria will come kiss him now.
Allons, gallant knights, a la maison!* * (Let's go home)
Stop!
o_||_ _
- Come on, Knights! - Forward! Forward!
Sound the alarm, Tsar!
My brave soldiers! Our Tsar was insulted with a rude gesture!
Let's die for him, to the last man! Hup-two!
Forward! March!
Hup-two! Hup-two! Hup-two! Hup-two! Hup-two! Hup-two!
Ah, woe is me!
It's the end of my tsardom!
You will answer for this!
At the pike's behest and at my request... Stove, take me home again.
Where are you running to?
I can't explain because we are in total panic.
Hup-two... hup-two...
At the pike's behest and at my request... Cannonballs, fly back!
That's that! My land is done for!
Don't worry! We'll sweep them out now!
At the pike's behest and at my request...
Victory! Victory!
Ask for anything you want!
If you want, I'll make you prime minister!
- No. I am too lazy to be a minister.
Minister... is not my thing.
So, what do you want then?
- Princess Maria!
Stop! You're forgetting your Tsar!
What is this!? Am I Tsar or not?!
Oi! Where is my crown? Without my crown, what sort of Tsar am I?
Here it is! Oh, my goodness! Oh, my gracious!
The devil take it! I will buy a cap instead of a crown
and will go traveling abroad!
Thus the tale ended.
The Tsar was no more.
And Emelian and princess Maria
began to live a happy life.
The End subs by Eus, based VisitToFairytales translation, edited by Niffiwan